10 Purposes of Marriage

It has always been true that as the family goes, so goes the culture. We shouldn’t be surprised then that our culture is in disarray. People don’t value marriage today much less see its significance. And with the decline of marriage, so too has the culture fallen into shambles. In view of this, Christians must continually be reminded of the blessing and purpose of marriage. Marriage was designed by God and is hugely consequential. If we are going to see renewal and revival in the church and in the culture as a whole, it must start with the family. It must start with husband and wife being faithful and obedient to God’s Word.

Here are 10 purposes of marriage. I will let the Scriptures speak for themselves.

  1. Companionship: “Then the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him” (Genesis 2:18). “Do two walk together, unless they have agreed to meet?” (Amos 3:3).

 

  1. Enjoyment: “Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth” (Proverbs 5:18). “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled” (Hebrews 13:4).

 

  1. Completeness: “And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man He made into a woman and brought her to the man. Then the man (Adam) said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh” (Genesis 2:22-24).

 

  1. Fruitfulness or Procreation: “And God blessed them. And God said to them, Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it.” (Genesis 1:28). “Blessed is the man who fears the Lord, who greatly delights in his commandments! His offspring will be mighty in the land; the generation of the upright will be blessed” (Psalm 112:1-2).

 

  1. Protection: The husband is to protect the wife by laying down his life for her. “Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her” (Ephesians 5:25). The wife is to protect the home. “Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled” (Titus 2:3-5).

 

  1. Typify Christ and the Church: Marriage is to be a human picture or object lesson of the divine relationship between Christ and believers. “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church” (Ephesians 5:31-32).

 

  1. Sanctification: “For this is the will of God, your sanctification” (1 Thessalonians 4:3) It will be readily acknowledged that living in close proximity with another person has a way of exposing our warts and bumps and bruises (in short, our sin). We see our own pride and selfishness in ways we can’t when isolated. God can and will use this to make us more like Jesus and to give us victory over indwelling sin.

 

  1. Support and Trust: “Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil….a threefold cord is not quickly broken” (Ecclesiastes 4:9,12). “An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain” (Proverbs 31:10-11).

 

  1. Mutual Honor and Respect: “Husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel” (1 Peter 3:7). “Let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband” (Ephesians 5:33).

 

  1. The Glory of God: “For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be the glory forever. Amen” (Romans 11:36). This is the goal of everything, including marriage.

The Pastor and Personal Holiness

“My people’s greatest need is my personal holiness.” So wrote Robert Murray M’Cheyne (1813-1843), an influential Scottish pastor of his time. If you were to survey pastors today and ask them this simple question: “what do you think the greatest need of your congregation is?” I suspect you would get a whole host of different answers, and few would have anything to do with personal holiness.

Admittedly, it is tough to write on a subject such as personal holiness. I know my own sins better than anyone else. I often find myself returning to the words of Paul to his young apprentice, Timothy.  The pastoral epistles (1 and 2 Timothy, Titus) are a goldmine of rich instruction, especially for young ministers. The last verse of 1 Timothy 4 is one such example. “Keep a close watch on yourself and on the teaching.  Persist in this, for by so doing you will save both yourself and your hearers.” (1 Timothy 4:16) Another example is 2 Timothy 2:22, which says, “flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord with a pure heart.”

Being a Dad, my kids are quick to point out when they see me teaching something or correcting them for something I don’t actually do myself. In all reality, I am going to be a much better Dad if my life actually aligns with my teaching. Maybe you have heard the saying, “do as I say but not as I do” before. We can chuckle at that, but if that is what we are advocating in our parenting or in our pastoring, then we have a serious problem. When a pastor is humble and striving for holiness, there is a much better chance his people will actually listen to him. On the other hand, when his lifestyle does not match his teaching, there is a good chance his people will tune him out.

Kevin DeYoung is right when he says, “My congregation needs me to be humble before they need me to be smart.  They need me to be honest more than they need me to be a dynamic leader.  They need me to be teachable more than they need me to teach at conferences.” No doubt pastors face a lot of pressure.  There are a number of different expectations that keep pastors busy these days.  My recommendation is place one expectation on yourself that trumps all others – a commitment to personal holiness. Before you can effectively “make disciples,” you must be a disciple. If you fail to walk closely with the Lord and “keep in step with the Spirit,” (Galatians 5:25) you will soon lose your ability to minister to others.  No pastor wants that, and no church wants that for their pastor.

What a great reminder this is from Mr. M’Cheyne. As Pastors we ought to be committed to preaching the Word, loving the people, being men of prayer, and training and discipling new believers. But if we desire to have a fruitful and effective ministry, then it must start with our own personal holiness. Integrity, godliness, and holiness of life serve as the foundation for all spiritual leadership (1 Timothy 3:1-7). If we get sloppy and try to cut corners and neglect our own walk with the Lord, we are bound for trouble. We may even find ourselves disqualified from leadership. This has happened countless times and it often has a devasting effect on the pastor’s family and his church.

Pastoral ministry is a high calling – a very high calling! We must constantly pray for the grace of God while at the same time keep in mind that our aim is to please the one who enlisted us, the Lord Jesus Christ (2 Timothy 2:3). If He has truly called you, He will give you the moral integrity and the grace you need to be about the care of souls. “He who calls you is faithful; He will surely do it” (1 Thessalonians 5:24). Glory be to God!

Let Your Life Shine For Jesus!

I once read the story of a pastor who was invited to debate an atheist. The pastor agreed to debate on one condition – that the atheist would bring 50 people who had been transformed by being atheists. The pastor in turn would bring 50 people who had been transformed by the power of Jesus Christ. As you may have guessed, the atheist admitted he would not be able to find that many people impacted by rejecting Christian theism.

As you seek to give an answer for the hope that is within you (1 Peter 3:15), please don’t forget about the power of testimony. A great example of this is the blind man who was healed by Jesus. Like him, we can confidently say, “One thing I do know, that though I was blind, now I see” (John 9:25). It is only Jesus Christ who has the power to transform and heal our sin-sick lives.

As Christians, we must present a rational defense of the Christian faith. But lets also remember that there is a place for testimony in our apologetics. No one has ever been transformed by rejecting the existence of God. But millions upon millions of people have been transformed by the rescuing power of Jesus Christ. As the Scriptures remind us, “if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold the new has come.  All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation” (2 Corinthians 5:17-18). Friend, if you are truly “in Christ” then the world is going to take notice. May we strive to be the kind of people God has called us to be in His Word.

“In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven” (Matthew 5:16).

The Queen, the President, and the Name above all Names

Last month Queen Elizabeth II met with President Trump for the first time. This was the 12th president that she has met with during her remarkably long reign (incidentally, the only president she didn’t meet with was Lyndon Johnson). During her 66 year reign, the Queen has met with countless other Presidents, Prime Ministers, world leaders, and dignitaries, and she will probably meet with many more depending on how much longer she lives.

The name “Queen Elizabeth II” is known and loved all over the world. She will go down in history as a great Queen, but the thing we need to keep in mind is he is just a woman. She is just a human being. It is well known that the Queen has faced family problems down through the years. Those who are closest to the Queen would acknowledge that she has personal struggles, just like you and me. And at the root of it all is the fact that the Queen is a sinner in desperate need of the grace of God.

Down through the ages, there have been men and women like the Queen – not many, but a few. They were great leaders and they had names that were revered and esteemed and praised. But as Christians, we know that there is one name that stands alone. There is One Name that is the name above all names! And that is the name of Jesus. Listen to how the apostle Paul explains in in Philippians 2.

“Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, 10 so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth,11 and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.”

Why do we bow down before Jesus?

We bow down and worship because He is Lord. We bow down and worship because He has the name that is above every name. We bow and down and worship because He is worthy of all our praise, honor, and adoration. We bow down and worship because He is the Savior and Redeemer of all His people.

Jesus, Jesus Jesus, sweetest name I know…….

 

 

The Blessing of Marriage

Stephane and I were married ten years ago tomorrow – July 26th, 2008. It has been an amazing journey and I am grateful to God for my wife. Here are just a few of the things I have learned from our decade-long marriage:

 

  1. The importance of praying together. Steph and I pray together every day. As the saying goes, “couples that pray together, stay together.” Praying together is a constant reminder of our need for the Lord. Only Christ can supply the grace and wisdom we need day by day.
  2. How much God loves us. Marriage is to be a reflection of the type of love and intimacy we can have with God. Just like the marital relationship, our Lord desires that we enjoy a deep knowledge of Him, not just a superficial knowledge. In this sense, it is amazing to me how instructive marriage can be when it comes to our relationship with the Lord.
  3. I am a sinner. Ok, ok, I guess I knew that before.  But marriage has a way of exposing all those warts and ugly character traits that we used to be able to hide. After ten years of marriage, I am much more aware of my own selfishness, pride, anger and sinfulness in general than ever before. As a side note, forgiveness in marriage is really powerful. You probably sin more against your spouse than you do anyone else, but the gospel reminds us that we can “forgive one another, as God in Christ forgave you” (Ephesians 4:32).
  4. As head of our home, I have a lot more responsibilities.  It used to be that I only had to look out for myself and my own interests.  Now I have a family that I am responsible for. Obviously, this is a huge change from my pre-marriage days, but at the same time it is a good change. And even though I am the head of our home (1 Corinthians 11:3), there have been many times where the Lord has told me – LISTEN TO HER – SHE IS MY GOOD GIFT TO YOU! These are the moments where I must submit (Ephesians 5:21) and listen to my wife.  All honest husbands will affirm the need for this.
  5. The Lord takes care of us. Just like any couple, there have been many issues that we have had to work through and deal with in our relationship. Jesus said, “In this world you will have trouble, but take heart I have overcome the world” (John 16:33). In anything and everything, the Lord has taken care of us and has brought us to a new level of faith we could have never imagined when we first got married. Glory be to God!
  6. Our love keeps growing over time. Before we got married, it was hard to imagine loving Stephane any more than I already did. But after ten years of marriage, I can honestly say our love for one another continues to grow. In the same way, our love for the Lord should also keep growing and multiplying. I like how Peter puts it at the end of his second letter: But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To him be the glory both now and to the day of eternity. (2 Peter 3:18)

To summarize, marriage is an amazing gift from God and is truly fulfilling. That’s not to say there won’t be trials and difficulties along the way, but a Christ-centered couple can always know that God will supply an abundance of grace in your time of need.

The Four Major Questions the Reformation Answered in a New Way

Last year was a landmark year for Protestant Christians. People from all over the world gathered in big groups and small groups and everything in between to recognize the achievements of the Reformation. This reached a climax on October 31, which marked the 500thanniversary of what many call the start of the Protestant Reformation. On that day in 1517, Martin Luther famously nailed his 95 Theses to the Castle Church door in Wittenberg, Germany. That event, though unbeknownst at the time, would go on to change the world.

 

Even though last year’s anniversary celebrations garnered a lot of attention, I believe that most Christians still don’t know what the Reformation was all about and why it was so revolutionary. I recently stumbled across a very helpful quote from historian Bruce Shelley that explains what was at the heart of the Protestant Reformation. It helps us understand what Luther and the many other Reformers were protesting against. Here it is:

 

Martin Luther….. “took four basic Catholic (Roman Catholic) concerns and offered invigorating new answers. To the question, how is a person saved? Luther replied, “not by works but by faith alone.” To the question, where does religious authority lie? he answered, “not in the visible institution called the Roman church but in the Word of God found in the Bible.” To the question, what is the church? he responded, “the whole community of Christian believers, since all are priests before God.” And to the question, what is the essence of Christian living? He replied, “serving God in any useful calling, whether ordained or lay.” To this day any classical description of Protestantism must echo those central truths.” (page 257 Church History in Plain Language – 4thedition, by Bruce Shelley)

 

We could take a lot of time to unpack the significance of these new answers to truly foundational questions. However, we will save that for another blog post at another time. I will commend to you the study of church history and the study of the Reformation in particular. This was titanic movement and work of God through the means of ordinary men and women. It is certainly something we can celebrate and praise God for, even centuries later.

 

 

The Parable of the Seed Growing and the Miracle of Regeneration

I was privileged to spend my growing up years on a farm in Saskatchewan, Canada. My Dad was a grain farmer and I got front row seeds to watch him as he undertook his farming enterprise. In the spring, my Dad started by preparing the ground – tilling it up getting it ready for seeding. Then came the actually planting part. With the aid of modern equipment, billions of little seeds found their way into the ground. But then after the rush of getting the crop planted, things rapidly slowed down. Most of what you do over the summer is wait…..and watch…..and prepare for the harvest.

Jesus told a parable in Mark 4 that is unique to the gospels and powerfully illustrates the miracle of salvation. He said, “The Kingdom of God is as if a man should scatter seed on the ground. He sleeps and rises night and day, and the seed sprouts and grows; he knows not how. The earth produces by itself, first the blade, then the ear, then the full grain in the ear. But when the grain is ripe, at once he puts in the sickle, because the harvest has come.”

In this passage, Jesus did what he often does, and that is to use an agricultural illustration in order to illustrate truth. Of course, agriculture was a touch-point to the culture, much more so than it is today. And Jesus’ basic point is that when you plant a seed in the ground, remarkably…..it grows! Most of the time farmers and gardeners take this for granted. They know that it is going to happen, but they can’t explain why or how it does happen.

Have you ever stopped to think about how amazing it is that seeds grow? Why is it that as soon as you put this little seed in the ground and give it some water and sunlight that all of a sudden it starts to grow? It is a miracle! In our day and age, scientists can explain incredible complexity, but yet how do you explain the miracle of growth. I guess in one sense, you can’t. It is simply beyond human comprehension. In other sense, we as Christians can say – it’s a God thing.

This same is true of regeneration or “the new birth.” God gives spiritual life to those who are dead in their trespasses and sins (Ephesians 2:1). God doesn’t do this because of any worth or merit on the part of the sinner; He does so simply because of His grace and mercy (Ephesians 2:8-9). I would add that God does this on the basis of the worth and merit of Christ and His atoning sacrifice on the cross.

In this parable, the farmer represents the evangelist and the seed represents the gospel. And what is crystal clear is that the farmer doesn’t make the seed grow. Rather, he goes to bed and meanwhile, remarkably, the seed grows all by itself. That is why we would say that regeneration is a God thing. As Romans 1:16 says: “For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes.” Notice how it is not the power of the evangelist. It is not his persuasive words that cause another person to be born again. No, it is the power of God. It is God and only God “who gives life to the dead and calls into existence the things that do not exist,” (Romans 4:17) who can work such a miracle in the heart of a sinner.

By way of application, rejoice in your salvation! The Bible says, “yet I will rejoice in the Lord; I will take joy in the God of my salvation” (Habakkuk 3:18). Along with that, as you spread the seed of God’s word, always keep in mind that it is not in your power to save the sinner. It is only the power of God and the atoning sacrifice of Christ that have the power to save. So……go humbly and confidently and be about the work of your Master.